PURPOSE
To help young people explore their own background,
experiences and identity.
To help young people understand some of the factors
that can influence how they behave.
To help young people understand that their behaviour
can have an impact on other people’s wellbeing.
GROUP
Primary and secondary aged children and young people.
If delivering with primary aged children, it may be appropriate
to deliver wholly as group discussion.
MATERIALS
Flipchart paper, Iceberg handouts for everyone in the group
PREPARATION
Exploring the concept of respect can be a helpful way to set the scene for this activity. You may wish to use
respectme’s #respectmeans resource to facilitate this conversation.
ACTIVITY – PART 1 TIME 30 minutes
Draw an iceberg on flipchart and ask group what they know about icebergs, referring to photos or video.
Emphasise that most is hidden from view.
Explain that in some ways people are similar to icebergs – some things about us are on the surface (e.g.
physical characteristics, dress, accent). Other aspects of who we are hidden below the surface, and not
immediately obvious (past experiences, where we grew up, our values, things we like or dislike, our beliefs).
Facilitator may want to consider their own identity iceberg and add examples to the flipchart as they go.
If appropriate for your group, ask young people to consider the risk of making assumptions about people, and
role of prejudice and intolerance, see more information on this subject on the respectme website.
Ask everyone to take some time to complete their own iceberg. Allow extra time for sharing in pairs.
Have a concluding group discussion pulling out that while there are lots we each have in common, we are all
completely unique.
SELF REFLECTION MY ICEBERG IDENTITY
REMINDER
Talking about bullying can be
sensitive, remind your group
where they can seek support or
who they can talk to if they are
aected by the session.
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ACTIVITY – PART 2 TIME 25 minutes
Ask the group to consider that behaviour is also something we can see. We can see kind actions (compliments,
sharing, including everyone) and we can see disrespectful actions too (insults, name-calling, excluding, bullying
behaviours).
If we think about behaviour as an iceberg – the behaviour is the part we can see or hear, but what has
influenced how we behave often sits below the surface.
Using another iceberg on flipchart this time with a line drawn vertically down the middle of it:
1. Ask group to come up with an example of respectful behaviour (e.g. congratulating someone on a test
result) and write this above the waterline.
Next ask for the things that might sit below the surface that that drives this behaviour. Examples below.
• It makes you feel good to compliment someone – feelings and emotions
• You would want someone to congratulate you on a test result – your needs
• Your family taught you to treat others with respect – your experiences and culture
• Your friends all congratulate each other – the influences in your life
2. Next ask the group for an example of disrespectful behaviour (e.g. leaving someone out of a group) and
write it above the surface on the other side. Next ask for the things that might sit below the surface that
drives this behaviour. Examples below.
• Feeling angry, upset, insecure – feelings and emotions
• Pressure from others to leave them out - the influences in your life
• You’ve been left out of a group before and you don’t want it to happen again - your experiences and
needs
• Your parents gave you advice that if you’re being bullied or left out you should stand up for yourself. –
your culture and the influences in your life
Have a concluding group discussion that reminds the group:
• While there are lots we each have in common we are all completely unique
• What influences our behaviour is also dierent, and we need to reflect on what those drivers are for us as
individuals.
• This can help us each understand how our behaviour can impact on the wellbeing of others.
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EXPERIENCES AND OUTCOMES
For delivering Curriculum for Excellence, this activity can be used to explore:
I know that we all experience a variety of thoughts and emotions that aect
how we feel and behave and I am learning ways of managing them.
HWB 0-02a / HWB 1-02a /
HWB 2-02a / HWB 3-02a /
HWB 4-02a
I understand that my feelings and reactions can change depending upon
what is happening within and around me. This helps me to understand my
own behaviour and the way others behave.
HWB 0-04a / HWB 1-04a /
HWB 2-04a / HWB 3-04a /
HWB 4-04a
I understand that there are people I can talk to and that there are a number
of ways in which I can gain access to practical and emotional support to help
me and others in a range of circumstances.
HWB 0-03a / HWB 1-03a /
HWB 2-03a / HWB 3-03a /
HWB 4-03a
I understand that my feelings and reactions can change depending upon
what is happening within and around me. This helps me to understand my
own behaviour and the way others behave.
HWB 0-04a / HWB 1-04a /
HWB 2-04a / HWB 3-04a /
HWB 4-04a
I know that friendship, caring, sharing, fairness, equality and love are
important in building positive relationships. As I develop and value
relationships, I care and show respect for myself and others.
HWB 0-05a / HWB 1-05a /
HWB 2-05a / HWB 3-05a /
HWB 4-05a
I understand that people can feel alone and can be misunderstood and left
out by others. I am learning how to give appropriate support.
HWB 0-08a / HWB 1-08a /
HWB 2-08a / HWB 3-08a /
HWB 4-08a
As I explore the rights to which I and others are entitled, I am able to exercise
these rights appropriately and accept the responsibilities that go with them. I
show respect for the rights of others.
HWB 0-09a / HWB 1-09a /
HWB 2-09a / HWB 3-09a /
HWB 4-09a
I recognise that each individual has a unique blend of abilities and needs.
I contribute to making my school community one which values individuals
equally and is a welcoming place for all.
HWB 0-10a / HWB 1-10a /
HWB 2-10a / HWB 3-10a /
HWB 4-10a
I recognise that we have similarities and dierences but are all unique. HWB 0-47a / HWB 1-47a
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SHARE!
Get involved in the #ChooseRespect
community and share some photos
from your session on social media
tagging @_respectme_ and
#ChooseRespect.
physical
characteristics
past experiences
where we grew up
values
our likes
& dislikes
beliefs
accent
dress
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